Looking for Effective Anger Management Help? Start Here

Anger is extraordinarily prevalent in our society. Stress, fear, failure, and disappointment — all these things can cause intense outbursts of rage that can destroy relationships and leave families in tatters. Irvine Christian Counseling can help guide you through managing and overcoming anger in healthy ways.

The problem is, many fail to seek anger management help, letting a deep rage fester and build underneath the surface instead. When this happens, it is only a matter of time before they explode – and it could be the most seemingly insignificant thing that sets them off.

Anger Management Help that Lasts

Fighting against anger on your own will be a futile task. The root cause of your rage must be dealt with in order to find freedom from this destructive vice. As Christians, it is exceedingly important that we deal with our anger issues and allow God to help us.

Just remember the fruit of the spirit detailed in Galatians 5: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. So, how can we deal with our anger and attain these wonderful things? Let’s take a look at each fruit, and why it is so crucial in ridding us of anger.

Love

Love is a powerful thing. Whether it is expressed through romance, family or friendship, love is all about serving others. It is about taking the focus off yourself and committing to another person in words and deed. Anger, however, is rooted in a place of selfishness.

When you feel slighted or wronged in some way, an angry response is never too far away. But when you choose to love others with a God-centered attitude, you will see your anger begin to dwindle. So, seek to make a conscious decision to focus on loving others, and give your own anger less power over your life.

Joy

Joy is an amazing thing. Circumstances cannot touch it, and it cannot be stolen away by material loss. It can transcend your earthly situation. True joy can be achieved only when we elevate Jesus to the very center of our lives. When joy is at the heart of your daily life, anger really will melt away. Let God fill you with all the joy of his love.

Peace

Peace is the opposite of anger. Peace, when rooted in a relationship with Christ, cannot be taken away through adverse worldly situations. When you possess that “peace that passes all understanding,” anger must flee. Only a relationship with God will give you true peace and will fill you with a wonderful assurance of his healing love. Don’t just fight off anger with prayer but ask the Lord for His peace to come and wash over you.

Patience

When we are in a spiritually dry season, anger can rise to the surface. Outbursts of rage can be sparked by something as simple as being forced to wait on a call to your car insurance company. As a result of the long wait, when you finally get through to the operator, you may direct your anger toward them and may become irate and rude.

In this instance, you have become void of patience. Patience requires practice, and it is difficult! In our modern culture, we are used to immediacy in every area of our lives. We can check our emails with the tap of a button, order food with the swipe of a screen, and expect our needs to be met in an instant. But how do we react when this doesn’t happen?

Often, an inability to be patient reveals our spiritual ill-health. We must practice patience in simple everyday situations, such as waiting in line at the grocery store. Instead of allowing frustration to overcome, ask God to fill you with peace and compassion – speak to some people around you, and learn to walk in the ways of the Lord. Just slow down for a minute!

Kindness

Showing kindness to people is an absolutely critical aspect of combating anger. Again, it is taking the focus off yourself and placing emphasis on the needs of others. How can you be angry when you are engaging in acts of kindness toward those in need?

It is not just about covering over anger by doing things for other people or distracting yourself from your need to sort out your issues. Sometimes, an increase of kindness in your life can actually be the very remedy that rids you of the anger you’ve been carrying deep within.

Goodness

Many are angry because they feel they are not “good” enough. Of course, there is an element of truth in this assertion. We are all sinners in need of God’s grace. But we must not let this drive us into a spiraling anger.

Know that Jesus paid the price for your sin, and live boldly for him. We can choose to let anger at ourselves become a defining factor in our lives and the decisions we make, or we can allow God to fill us with His peace and purpose.

Faithfulness

Being faithful to God and to others can be an essential part of reducing anger in your life. When we mess up and are unfaithful in some capacity, we often react with anger to our own failure. But when we ask God for help and ensure that we are faithful in our relationships, our work, and our spiritual life, anger has less opportunity to take a hold of us.

Gentleness

Gentleness is an incredible quality to have. When you interact with a gentle person, they bring a sense of restoration and comfort. To know that someone is not being swayed by the afflictions of this world, and are choosing to be gentle despite hardship, is a wonderful testimony to the power of God.

As we seek to be gentle with others, anger gets pushed to the sidelines in our lives. Showing gentleness will help your relationships flourish as people come to know you as someone who they can approach without judgment or fear.

Self-control

Self-control is the fruit of the spirit that is most commonly defined as being an antidote to outbursts of anger. Of course, if you are able to practice self-control, you are unlikely to succumb to fits of rage. But it is important to note that without the other fruits present in your life, self-control will be difficult to exhibit.

Also, self-control comes from God. Attempting to muster it up yourself is a futile task; innately, we are too selfish, too quick-tempered and too easily led astray. We must ask the Lord for a spirit of self-control every single day.

There is great difficulty in attempting to simply eradicate anger from your life unless you are replacing it with something better. The fruits of the spirit, if engaged in fully and without limit, will begin to diminish the anger present in your heart, and will subsequently help you eradicate it in your everyday life.

It is important to do some diagnosing, also. Where is your anger rooted? Why is it rising up within you? What can be done to help you remedy the very causes of such horrible feelings? These may be questions that are best addressed alongside a Christian counselor, who will possess the skills to help you decipher your anger issues and usher in those wonderful fruits of the spirit into your life.